Zebras, Unicorns and Four wheeling in miniskirts

 Who wakes up in the morning and says, "I think I am going to feed mythical animals and then get my redneck on"? Well, I do!  Welcome to Planet Kelly. 

The kids and I only find ourselves in Western Pennsylvania about one month a year.  During the other eleven months, my parents find the craziest things to do for entertainment.  We have classics like county fairs, bike rides, and boating to riding in a random parade tossing candy.  Well, let today be no different.  We found ourselves in Eastern Ohio at Wagon Trails which is a hybrid of Noah's Ark and Jurassic Park.  The idea is you ride through the park in a wagon with a bucket of feed and...act like a trough. 

Here's how it works.  You get your bucket of chow

The animals come on over  

You can pet them (or not)

Then you can "sprinkle" (I WANT SPRINKLES) them some grub. 

Some of the animals preferred to eat from under the seats

In a bout of confusion, this cow tongued my shoe.  Poor dude thought it was his uncle.  I bought these in Italy, so more likely it is this guy's baby than his uncle.  Just saying.  Or he might have a foot fetish...which Rex Ryan has taught us all is a, "personal matter".  And who could resist these yummy toes with a two week old home pedicure.  I am shameless foot bait.

This little dude tried to eat my shirt and Ty's sunglasses. 

It was about an hour ride all said and done.

We saw lots of amazing animals, but this is my fave!

As much fun as it is to see all the really cool animals,  there is one animal that I would like to see left behind next time the ark is built.  Goats are proof that God tripped on acid during creation.  If it weren't for the goat cheese/milk, goats would just be a sadistic crime against nature.  

Besides goats, I have a fondness for all the rest of the horned creatures...even horned owls even though they are clearly cheaters.  The symbol of our contrata (neighborhood) has a unicorn on it which of course means...well...not a lot.  Here I thought Unicorns looked mainly like white horses with a horn and had mad purifying powers.  Sounds alright.  You can imagine my surprise when I discovered thy mythical beast and it was....

a goat. 

I tried to find out if it bled rainbows, but the damned thing just kept trying to eat my clothes.  Clearly it was a male. 

So to make my world right again, I took my Dad's four wheeler for a couple laps 

In my mini skirt. 

Felt good. 

 Tomorrow My Dad and I take the bikes into the woods for a day of Jackass b-footage.

Should be fun. 

I think I will wear pants.